Yesterday, when it was un-sun in Hyderabad, I sat on one of the empty chairs in front of Sagar Stores outside the University Library. I was sitting with a double coffee; in a happy mood, after my few months of illness and a few weeks of travel, revived to know myself and my other self better. I was all fresh, full of love and peace. Everything was positive. The evening air, the cool breeze, a lonely me; pure romantic setting! Sitting with the open book in my lap, I was lost in the new Murakami I gathered from the various Murakami lovers of the University.
Tell you the truth, she's not that good-looking. She doesn't stand out in any way. Her clothes are nothing special. The back of her hair is still bent out of shape from sleep. She isn't young, either - must be near thirty, not even close to a "girl," properly speaking. But still, I know from fifty yards away: She's the 100% perfect girl for me. The moment I see her, there's a rumbling in my chest, and my mouth is as dry as a desert.
I suddenly felt that, may be, and may be this is what every woman or every man wants to find out in life. The 100% perfect one. And once you are there, you are not there forever. The 100% perfect one cannot stay perfect forever.I think what holds people together is the emotional interdependence you share with the other which in common language we call "intimacy". And that is something which you can never, ever fake, or so I feel. You can never be detached in love,nor be dispassionate. It is always an attachment, a passion and above all a deep rooted peace one feels with the other. Peace needn't necessarily be a silent and perfect way of being. Peace is there even in the most troubled relationships. The more complex the emotional interdependence is, the more pleasurable each other's presence will be. There will be times when you tend to confuse between your self and the self of the person whom you love. And along with the pleasures, there will be frustrations, anger and even hurt.Love transforms people, molds people in relation to the other person's identity, and as far as it is a mutual process, it is a real good thing to happen. No body is perfect and if you can undo certain things and add certain new things with the influence of the other and vice versa, eventually there will be two really nice human beings together, growing(glowing too) in love.
I think you should love, fight, shout, bully, console and again repeat all of these throughout to make it 100% forever. It is like refilling the glass again before it is empty. Oh, what is peace without War, honey? What is 100% without 99%? I think my mad self is back.I think I can talk endless rubbish when it comes to love. I think I should stop. I think I have loads of work to do. I think I have signed out.
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